Yes, I relate everything to music!
It's so hard sometimes to say "I'm not going to take in anymore." Especially when you still love and care about someone. You don't want to hurt their feelings, you don't want to put them out, you don't want to 'make waves'.
But sometimes you just have to say enough is enough. You have to put back into perspective that you have not been extended that same respect and you have to stand up for yourself.
I had to do that last night. There is one situation that still leaves me feelings used and horribly insulted. And I just have to stand my ground that it needs to change. ALL other ties to me have been severed, no need to hold onto this one EXCEPT it helps this other person out and makes their life easier.
Have I been afforded any comforts here? Or was I dropped a brand-new house, all the bills, and all the responsibilities of a single mom?? Why should I make considerations and accomodations to make anyone elses life easier??
It's seriously insulting and makes me feel used.
I will say, last night was the first time I felt any bit of sincerity in an appology. I really think it was from the heart and I really think that she felt bad for hurting my feelings. However, that doesn't change the damage that was done and it doesn't change the fact that this is how life is now. You cannot pick and choose what's convenient for you and only live by those things. It's all or nothing, so take care of it!!
I hate feeling used. I hate it more than anything. And I just won't take it anymore.. .. ..
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
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