So M and I have been seeing each other a lot and not a day goes by that we don't talk. Things are truly amazing and so ... different. He is becoming such a good friend first and foremost. I can talk to him about anything, and he can do the same. We talk about random stuff, important stuff, and share a little more about ourselves each day. We laugh, comfort, care so much about each other. The relationship is so special in so many ways.
This past weekend was great together. Saturday night he came over and we shared a super evening. We had champagne and strawberries and pineapple with chocolate fondue. We watched a movie and cuddled on the couch. Often we both share how comfortable it is with one another. No pressures, no stress. No expectations. No censoring. Nothing but acceptance and shared enjoyment of our company. It was a wonderful night ... Sunday we got together again and things took a little bit of a turn...
So we went to pizza and were watching the football game. On another TV they had the MTV awards on. Well, Beyonce was on singing her single ladies song. And so I looked at M and asked, "She says all the single ladies should put their hands up... should I put my hands up?" He smiled and gave me a kiss, but didn't say anything ... Later we went back to his house to hang out for awhile and he said he wanted to talk about something....
The "L" Word. My heart was RACING. There had been many times over the last week or so when he'd say/do something and my first thought was "I love you". BUT I was NOT going to say it!!! NOT FIRST anyways. So I was nervous ... what was HE thinking?? So he said he believes there is all type of love in varying levels and then there is "in love". Long story short (because we could talk things to death ... communication is GREAT between us...) we both agreed that we love each other. The exact definition of that love is uncertain, however it's very much there. So... the "L" word has been introduced to our relationship. And then he also said, "BTW, to answer your question earlier ... I'd appreciate if you kept your hands down" and winked at me. So... guess we're officially more than just "kinda dating". =) (Not sure WHAT we are .... it's irrelevant anyways ... just know it's wonderful).. .. ..
The great thing is we are both so very honest with each other. It's easy to talk to one another and share how we feel and what we think. Even if we don't know how the other will react/feel, we promise each other to be honest and open. It's extremely refreshing and has been wonderful!
I won't lie ... I am not sure where my love for him falls today ... but I do know that it's headed down the path to being in love with him. I have more than once thought to myself "I can see myself with this man for the rest of my life". The best part is there is no rush. We both feel so comfortable and confident and happy where we are that there isn't a rush to move on to the "next level" or stake claim on one another. We do get swept away sometimes, but reground each other and remind ourselves that if this is true and right we have a lifetime to experience things together. So one day at a time, enjoy every moment, and no overthinking or rushing things!!
It's a different approach ... for both of us ... And it's working better than anything that's happened before for either of us! Definitely don't want to think too far ahead ... will acknowledge that we're pretty certain there is an "ahead" for us though!!! =)
((Oh for those that have asked ... He's 5'11"-ish, brown hair, green eyes ... GREAT body ... One kid ... Great career - law enforcement ... And has a heart big as the world. I am soooo lucky!!!))