Happy.. .. .. Really HAPPY

There have been many times in the last few months that I thought I would never get to this point. That I would never feel genuine, in and out, happiness. But here I am, a smile on my face, a smile in my heart, feeling HAPPY.

Things aren't going perfect. I have had some situations I had to deal with. But I have learned the skills I needed to handle them. I was honest and upfront. I didn't compromise myself to make anyone else happy. I held true to myself and was sensitive to others while being loyal to my needs. And it felt GOOD and it was EFFECTIVE. And I knew, then, that I had grown so much. That I have learned the lessons I needed and I am the person I have so long strived to be. I knew that I was going to make it and be stronger and better than ever.

Since then things have just been falling in place. I am maintaining boundaries with some, building wonderful relationships with others, and loving myself and my boys more than ever. I am more at peace than I have been in a long time. I am not stressing about what will happen next and where I am going. I have faith that things will work out how they should. I am confident in myself and the strength I have.

I talked to the ex the other day on the phone.... and it went WELL. We didn't fight at all, we talked business and then were even able to talk about general stuff. We laughed and we joked a little and it felt GOOD. I no longer harbored anger or hurt ... I was fine. And that was fantastic.

For the first time in a very long time I am happy. I don't delusion myself to think it'll always be this good, but if it is even 80% of the time I'm good. And, more than anything, I have the confidence to know I can handle anything that life throws my way.

I am happy. Really, really happy!